Ann
Ipock
Humorist,
author, speaker
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Myrtle Beach Herald
Business
Journal
Diane’s biggest tv blooper: getting her panty hose set on fire
by Ann Ipock March
21, 2006
With permission from Diane DeVaughn Stokes, the popular TV host of Southern
Style and co-owner of Stages Video, I’m going to tell a few of her
best stories, using her voice. Diane has begun writing a book of her most
hilarious moments. Suffice it to say, I’ll be the first in line
for an autographed copy when it’s published. Good luck, Diane! Here’s
what she told me when I interviewed her:
One time a man walked into Stages Video to sell video tapes. He was just
absolutely “full” of himself.
He took one look at me and said, “I need to speak to someone who
can make a decision around here.”
I cleared my throat, saying “You got her!”
“No, no, no! Not you!” he said, “I mean, like, an officer
in the company.”
I answered, “I AM an officer. Can I help you?”
He continued, “Oh, you’re the secretary? No, I’m not
talking about the secretary.”
At this point I was fuming; so, I quickly informed him, “Okay! Three
strikes and you’re OUT! First of all: I AM the President here. Second,
let this be a lesson: I’m not even going to speak to you.
“Just because a woman is involved in a business, doesn’t mean
she isn’t influential. And never minimize the secretary because
that person often makes the decisions.”
He apologized profusely, saying, “Let’s start over.”
But I would have no part of that and I sent him on his way.
My husband Chuck likes to say about me, “Tick her off once and it’s
okay. Tick her off twice and it’s still okay. But DON’T tick
her off a third time! Otherwise, Diane is the easiest going person in
the world.”
Many years ago I was doing a show in Florence called “Live: Pee
Dee People” on Channel 15. The guest I was interviewing, unfortunately,
had his zipper undone the entire time.
It was difficult to not be distracted with his underwear showing through.
But, we were televising live, so I couldn’t tell him. Sometimes
guests break out in hives from a case of “nerves.” I didn’t
have hives, but I know my face was red that day!
Once a woman’s wig fell off. She was on my TV show dressed as a
litter person. She was called Litter Flitter. She went around the schools
promoting an anti-litter campaign.
She even had a “litter wand” with a star on the end of it.
She went to shake her little fairy wand and a point in the star got caught
in her wig, jerking it off her head, showing only her stocking cap.
“Oh my God,” she said, “My husband is going to kill
me!”
While taping a show one day, the lights suddenly went out. I found out
later someone had hit a telephone pole. We finished the show in the dark
amidst my questioning.
But the director said, “Keep talking.” “How?”
I said, “We’ve got no lights.” “Keep talking!”
he demanded.
None of this, of course, was taped. Not the interview or the director’s
demands.
One day a sushi chef named Saito caught my panty hose on fire. His claim
to fame was to debone a chicken in less than one minute, then cook it
in teriyaki. He could not speak English. He did manage to say, “No
speak English.”
I couldn’t believe the owner of the restaurant sent a chef that
could not speak English: Like, I would do the talking and the chef would
do the cooking during the interview?
Chef Saito turned on the hibachi and a spark went off, landing on my leg.
I grabbed the dishrag off the table, banging it on my leg.
Suddenly, the chef said: “Oh no! We have to start over.”
I looked at him: “You said you couldn’t speak English!”
He answered, “I lied!”
After that, I told everyone, “I may love my husband, Chuck; but
Saito is the only one to set my panty hose on fire!”